Always use pressure. On top I use pressure on their face, more specifically on their orbital bones. I want them facing away from me. I train with an old judo man who said that in Japan when they eat an eel, they pin the head to the board. The body squirms around, but it is still in place. When I mount, I use my hips to increase pressure on their abdomen. When they breathe out, I don’t let their diaphragm inhale again. Now they take short breaths and start to panic and give you a reason to tap. Pressure passing allows you to slowly pass with less effort.